Pancakes Aren’t Easy to Make

I do my best to be healthy. I go to the gym, I live in NYC so I have to walk everywhere I go and I do my best to eat lots of veggies. Sometimes though, all I want is a huge ice cream cone, some french fries or a giant slurpee.

Yesterday, I had a sudden craving to make pancakes. In order to not gain 1,000 pounds, I found a recipe for Protein Pancakes. It wasn’t ideal but it would do the trick.

Boyfriend and I headed to the grocery store. Luckily finding all of our ingredients wasn’t too difficult (I think this proves that we are improving as the Culinary Experts we think we are). Next, we headed to his teeny tiny kitchen to whip up some amazing and guilt-free pancakes.

I followed the recipe. I really did. I promise. I had the dry ingredients and then added in the wet ingredients and then I added in the chocolate chips.

Okay, great, I have all of my ingredients (measured correctly) in my bowl and I’m mixing away, doing my thing, living the dream. Feeling good.

Inner Thoughts of Carly:

“Wow, I’m so excited to eat these pancakes”

“Hm, these are super chunky”

“Yep, still chunky”

“Maybe, if I stir faster the chunks will go away.”

“These chunks are here to stay”

“I hate these pancakes.”

“I’m gonna cook them anyway.”

Actual Conversation that happened:

Boyfriend: “Carly, I think we should add more milk, pancakes shouldn’t look like that.”

Me: “No, I did it right. I’m just gonna put all of this in the pan. It’s gonna work.”

So, being the stubborn Taurus that I am, I threw those chunky lumps into the pan. And guess what, boyfriend was most certainly right, and I was wrong. Those things were not pancakes, should never be called pancakes, and should never be eaten.

Failure.

I was sad.

Boyfriend then tried to save the day. He added an obscene amount of milk to what was left of the batter and then threw that batch into the pan.

Boyfriend’s version was a soupy mess.

We both left the apartment feeling hungry and sad.

I’m still depressed.

 

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Attempt #1

Today I tried to cook. That’s right, I put on my big girl pants and brought out the pots and pans. First, I googled easy recipes and settled on Chicken Scaloppini With Spinach and Linguine from Southern Living. It looked yummy and…it said easy to make. Note to self: don’t always trust the label.

So, I was off to the store. Unfortunately, the grocery store I went to wasn’t organized in the most convenient fashion. There was a lot of bumping, dropping, squeezing and sighing involved in finding all of my ingredients. Also, as a reborn meat eater getting the chicken was a little gross. But, in the end I got all of my supplies and it was an experience. Yay for grocery shopping in New York City!!

Now, the hard part. Cooking. Step number one was to make the linguine, and while that was cooking I had to chop up the asparagus and wash the spinach. Easy, breezy, beautiful. Then I had to strain the cooked noodles (thank you boyfriend for doing the heavy lifting) and put them back in the pot on low heat with the spinach and chopped up asparagus. All of that was accomplished seamlessly. Then I had to cut the chicken and make the flour coating for it. Oops we didn’t have pepper (we used garlic powder instead). Smooth sailing. Next it was time to cook the chicken. It actually didn’t go as badly as I thought it would. The most difficult part was knowing if the chicken was fully cooked or not because I haven’t eaten it in so long. Again, boyfriend you rock. Also, ouch at the stupid oil jumping out of the pan. Then, I realized that my noodles were still on low heat, and I was guessing that the recipe called for low heat because they didn’t know how slow I am at cooking. So, I looked at my noodles and while the top looked fine, the whole bottom layer was a nice golden brown. The color you want your marshmallows to look on a s’more. Nice. We turned that burner off and tried to take off all of the crunchy noodles. Bonus to the burning, the crunchy noodles were a nice little snack. I feel like there should have been dramatic music playing the whole time that I had the stove on. Then I made the sauce to go on my unique noodles. No problems here. Then boyfriend did some more heavy lifting and poured the sauce over my noodles. It ended up looking a little bit like ramen. Weird because it’s an Italian dish, but I wasn’t complaining. And, I didn’t set the apartment on fire.

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I also forgot some of the ingredients (capers, parmesan, salt)

Here are things I need to work on…

1.Not burning the noodles

2.Cooking faster

3.Learning how to cook chicken

4. Arm strength

5. Remembering ingredients

6.Buy pepper

My dinner actually ended up being kind of yummy. I don’t know if that’s because I was exhausted and starving or because it was actually good…